she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
