Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
