The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
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