that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize