God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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