At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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