David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
