SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
