i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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