I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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