Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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