I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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