Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize