just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
