this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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