he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
