Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
