I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Randomize
