i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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