And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
