there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
