Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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