butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
