I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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