For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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