his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
