i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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