Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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