it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
