please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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