Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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