And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
