do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
