garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize