am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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