dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
