yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm sobbing to NWA
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
