I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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