My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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