the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
