no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
