And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
