This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
