Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
