i need an iv and a liver transplant
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize