so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
