You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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