For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
