ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
