I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
