KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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